Recently my boyfriend of more than a year and I went out for drinks then came back to his place. We made love and fell asleep naked next to each other. Then, in the middle of the night, I woke up to the sound of my own fart, two farts, actually. The next morning, we both acted normal. He didn’t say anything, and neither did I. We even went to the movies at his suggestion. I am so incredibly mortified about this. I’m sure he heard it, because he is a light sleeper. I don’t know if I should talk about it, because he hasn’t brought it up. Even if he wants to bring it up, it’s probably awkward for him. What should I do?
—So Incredibly Humiliated
I farted in front of my boyfriend. - Slate Magazine
PS: How exactly would a conversation with your significant other about the fact that you farted in your sleep go? If my husband or I fart in front of each other (which happens kind of a lot, especially now that I’m pregnant), it mostly just involves a lot of snickering. What is there to discuss? It’s a fart. It’s not like you do it intentionally to offend people.
(via robot-heart)
The internet is unintentional comedic gold today.
I fart all the time. I can’t even imagine freaking out over farting. Farting happens. This woman is ridiculous. I’m sure I am an entire horn section in my sleep. Deal with it. If a significant other is going to throw shade over farting, then they need to be shown the motherfucking door.
(via rosa—sparks)
True story: I farted right on a dude’s balls before.
Post-coital snuggling and his bony-ass hip was right in my gut. We had had Mexican food for dinner. I have no regrets.
(via nanner)
B and I give scores for each other’s farts. Point categories include: volume, length, stink factor (mild, ew, horrifying, gag reflex inducing), and extra points for style.
(via joiesdevivre)
I had a fight with pretty much my entire family over Christmas because they all felt very strongly that farting and/or burping in front of your partner is completely inappropriate and disrespectful.
(via therealhaggers)
The only time my sister has ever come to me for love life advice it was about farting in bed. She had just done it and was beside herself, and wanted to know if I ever had and how I handled it. I think I laughed at her, which in retrospect is probably one of the reasons why we have never talked about sex again, but of course I’ve farted in bed. I never thought of it as a big deal, but then again I am very comfortable with farts.
(via whineandbeer)
So I probably lose Feminist Points, but I cry humiliated tears when this happens. Sorry, I can be all empowered and shit about everything but bodily functions
